Kerry Sorry for 'Stuck in Iraq' Remarks

The Senator from Massachusetts has had an apparent change of heart and has decided NOT to pursue a career in stand-up comedy. Sources close to Mr. Kerry were heard to explain this sudden "course correction" by saying - "It's hard to be a comedian when NO ONE gets your jokes".

iWon News:

"Fearful of damaging his own party in next week's elections, Sen. John Kerry apologized Wednesday to 'any service member, family member or American' offended by remarks deemed by Republicans and Democrats to be insulting to U.S. forces in Iraq.

Six days before the election, the Democrats' 2004 presidential nominee said he wanted to avoid becoming a distraction in the final days of the battle for control of Congress. He added he sincerely regretted that his words were 'misinterpreted to imply anything negative about those in uniform.'

In a brief statement, Kerry attacked President Bush for a 'failed security policy.' Yet his apology, issued after prominent Democrats had urged him to cancel public appearances, was designed to quell a controversy that party leaders feared would stall their drive for big gains on Nov. 7."